Wednesday, October 5, 2011

thoughts on a thursday

I don't usually write blogs with questions for my readers in them. Probably because I'm an introvert and I don't think anyone reads this... But, I'm going to try something new this time!

I'm realizing the thing I miss the most when having a full time job is the time and motivation to be creative when I'm home. Most days I'm just so tired that all I want to do is lay down on my couch and watch my inticing television... It seems like I should want to go home and go crazy with all the fun things in my office! Unfortunately, that just hasn't been the case... please tell me I'm not the only one!?

(However, being informed of Pintrest has slightly helped me to get inspired!
Because I tend to just be overwhelmed when seeing that many awesome things, I need to narrow down which things I want to pursue and which I need to put on the back bunner.)

I'm also tired of making jewelry...!
I know, right?
I haven't felt inspired for months now.
I'm tired of all the stuff I've made and just can't seem to get past that and find something new to get excited about.
Any ideas, friends?

I also don't want to be a hermit and not have time to spend with other people.
It's already really hard for me to give up my free time because, to put it bluntly... I'm selfish.
Yeah, that's the ugly truth about it.
I really need to constantly pray for the desire to give of myself because it doesn't come natually for me.
There are those few ladies in my life that it's a complete joy to spend time with and that's never really hard for me.

But I have friends that are on my mind a lot that I know I should hang out with... and I just don't.
It takes initiative and persistence because they aren't usually asking me to hang out either.
Because they're busy and maybe a little selfish with their time too?

I also have this problem:
I want to be really close to every one of my friends.
I want to be able to spend quality time with them every week.
I feel like I'm leaving people out if I don't.
I feel like I'm failing.
I think that's a triat of one of the strength I have?

So I'm stuck in this tention...
of wanting to invest in people...
and wanting time to myself.

It's only with God's hand in my life that I can give up my own selfish desires and give of myself.

How are you at sacrificing things you'd rather do for things you should do?


  1. I deff hear you on the creative burn out. I think there is that invest in others/invest in yourself tension with everyone... like you can't do only one of them at a time or you'll bounce from one extreme to the other. Maybe you're feeling a stretching in your capacity?

    As for your other question... I think sometimes I'm really good at doing things I'm supposed to do, and other times I'm not. I go through cycles, but I'm not quite sure how to break a bad cycle before it lasts too long. :/

  2. i think you're asking a really good, challenging question! i'm glad you caused me to think about this in my own life. :)

    i struggle with selfishness too, like everyone does i'm sure. it's hard to make sacrifices when we just want time to ourselves, especially us introverts!! :) i definitely don't have it figured out, but i know that the few times i've forced myself to pick up the phone, or go out and hang with friends even though i just felt like staying home, i always felt better afterwards. the result is so worth it! so usually i talk myself into it and remind myself that i'll be so glad that i did hangout/call that friend.

    maybe you could try making a it a goal to hang out with a friend/friends once a week, and to call another friend once a week? having goals or a check list always helps me, if i don't schedule it, sometimes i just forget to do it.